A Personal Request...

Dear Friends and Family:

I am writing you today about something weighing heavy on my heart. California has an initiative on the ballot for November called Proposition 8. If it passes lesbians and gays will lose the right to marry that we received in June of this year. Passing this law means that thousands of couples who seek equality, a basic civil right, will be turned down.

Let me take a minute to shine light on one of those couples: my wife and I. I met my wife, Wendy, four years ago. I immediately fell head over hills for her. She is beautiful, intelligent, a strong Christian, persistent, funny, perfect in my eyes. Because of our strong, Christian beliefs we felt that we could not be together, and therefore; fought our connection for as long as we could. We had both fought same-sex attraction our whole life so this was nothing new, but this time fighting felt wrong. I had never felt what I felt for Wendy. We decided to step away from what we had been taught and sought answers for ourselves. This led us to reconciling our faith and our sexuality.

Two years later, before family and friends (a lot of you that I write today), we held a civil union at our church and vowed before God, family, and friends to be devoted to one another for the rest of our life.

Since then we started a worship service for LGBTIQ people, called Wesley Celebration, to allow others a place to learn about reconciling their faith and their sexuality. One year later we have a consistent worship service that is active in the community sharing God’s word, we have a bi-annual bible study, we are going on our first retreat, and more than anything we are seeing people who use to have faith returning to the church.

In June the courts passed a ruling allowing same-sex partners the opportunity to marry and we were at the clerk’s office the first day we could to get our marriage license. On September 12th, again in the presence of our family and a few friends, we were legally married. It has been a month since we were married. I can tell you not a day goes by that I don’t relish in the knowledge that we are legally married – that we are being treated equally under the law. When I call the doctor’s office to check on lab work for my wife it is given to me (I am not told they can only give that information to a spouse), when we took a recent trip to Disneyland we were given “Just Married” buttons and congratulated all day by cast members on our marriage, when I fill out an application or order a hotel room I can use our new last name: Lisbon-Slack which reminds me again of our legal union.

Many people say that same-sex couples shouldn’t be allowed to marry because they cannot procreate and that was the reason for marriage, but my wife and I are currently working on procreating. We are using a donor, just like many heterosexual couples who are infertile do. We too want what any other couple wants: to have a family.

We currently have a dog, Malia; two cats, Cleo and Ashes; Four turtles, Simon, Garfunkel, Yurtle, and Turtle who call us mom. Wendy is a teacher, I am a stay-at-home mom, we pay our taxes, we go to church, and all we want is the same rights given to heterosexual couples. There are thousands of couples like us who live in California. Many have been together 20, 30, 40, 50, even 60 years. Why shouldn’t same-sex couples who are in loving, committed relationships be given the right to be married?

Here are some of the untruths being said by those voting Yes on Prop 8:
1. It protects our children from being taught in public schools that "same-sex marriage" is the same as traditional marriage. (Prop 8 does not change any teachings in public schools. It only allows same-sex couples to get married).
2. Some will try to tell you that Proposition 8 takes away legal rights of gay domestic partnerships. That is false. Proposition 8 DOES NOT take away any of those rights and does not interfere with gays living the lifestyle they choose. (DOMESTIC PARTNERSHIPS and MARRIAGE AREN'T THE SAME. CALIFORNIA STATUTES CLEARLY IDENTIFY NINE REAL DIFFERENCES BETWEEN MARRIAGE AND DOMESTIC PARTNERSHIPS. Only marriage provides the security that spouses provide one another--it's why people get married in the first place! Think about it. Married couples depend on spouses when they're sick, hurt, or aging. They accompany them into ambulances or hospital rooms, and help make life-and-death decisions, with no questions asked. ONLY MARRIAGE ENDS THE CONFUSION AND GUARANTEES THE CERTAINTY COUPLES CAN COUNT ON IN TIMES OF GREATEST NEED).
3. It restores the definition of marriage to what the vast majority of California voters already approved and what Californians agree should be supported, not undermined (This was 8 years ago, how can we be sure the majority has not changed?).

Today, as I write you, I have but three requests. I ask #1 that you will join me in voting NO ON PROP 8 to support my relationship, and the thousands like mine in California. I ask #2 that you will write your own letter to your friends and family explaining why you support voting NO ON PROP 8. And I ask #3, if you are uncomfortable writing a letter you will at least forward my letter on to your friends and family. I believe that what truly changes the hearts of people who do not understand same-sex couples is seeing the face of who this affects; of hearing the story of the people they know fighting discrimination. Help me become not just another number, but a face to those you love. Let them know you love me and support my family, and you hope they will join you in doing the same.

Thank you for your time and your support,

Christa Lisbon-Slack

"We Must Be The Change We Wish To See In The World" - Gandhi